spiritual inflation

it's easy to start getting inflated once we make some kind of recognizable progress in spiritual life. we get the feeling that now we've really accomplished something, and convince ourselves that we're way closer to the truth than the average individual.

but anything that makes us feel more separate as opposed to more connected - no matter what the excuse - is taking us down a wrong path. a good barometer for judging whether we've taken an unproductive detour is to test how comfortable we feel in the presence of others, particularly people who aren't explicitly interested in spiritual matters.

if in the midst of such company there's a little voice in our head that says "i don't belong here" and we have a hard time interacting naturally and with sincerity, it means we've set ourselves apart from "the common herd" in our minds as special people deserving of special circumstances. this is quite obviously an effort by the ego to distinguish itself and accrue status - and there couldn't be a more common activity than that.

we are, always have been, and always will be an intimate part of all those who surround us. they need us and we need them; that's part of human life. we belong together because we are together. if we're using spirituality as a means to avoid some of life's most basic aspects, we're simply turning it into a game designed to make us feel comfortable as we neglect our responsibilities.

the danger always exists that spirituality will turn into yet another ploy by the ego to label ourselves as superior and brush off our basic human duties with spiritual concepts such as "it's all an illusion anyway," conveniently distorted to provide an excuse for our negligence. since spirituality seems so otherworldly at times, we forget that human spiritual development depends upon a good human foundation. spirituality is not an excuse to ignore our personal challenges and get off the hook from worldly responsibilities.

when we truly begin to integrate spiritual lessons, to learn them from the inside out, we feel increasingly comfortable around people (no matter what their personal interests) because we know how much we have in common with them. perhaps paradoxically, the more we leave our egos behind and in so doing become a deviation from the human norm, the more we identify ourselves as exactly like everyone else and rejoice in this fact.

what really matters

i can sit here and think i'm extra special because i write about things the larger part of our race hasn't come to grips with. but when i turn away from this computer i'm forced to face what really matters: the way i pet my dog, how i brush my teeth. there is no purpose above living this life, simply and contentedly, striving always to acknowledge and respect my innate commonality with all those i share this existence with. whether we fear, hate, misunderstand, envy or ridicule eachother, we're all so very intimate. we are truly all part of the same family; a handful of beings floating around on this little blue ball. we're all we've got. deep down we all know that and love eachother.

the counter-growth effect

as one's physical body is incresingly affected by the energy shifts associated with spiritual development (which in itself is characterized by the gradual undoing of the ego), the ego is quick to grab hold of seemingly extraordinary feelings and experiences and interpret them so as to attribute undue importance to itself.

"see?" it says, "that was VERY special. when have you ever felt anything like that? probably no one you know has ever experienced anthing like it." if these words hold sway, spiritual growth is being stunted or reversed in the name of ego inflation.

at certain stages, spiritual progress begins to effect strong changes in one's level of consciousness. this inevitably yields "extraordinary" experiences, which are actually only extraordinary from a previous standpoint and indicate nothing more than growth.

naturally, the ego will claim responsibility for these experiences. if this tactic isn't seen through, one can get lost in the delusion that one is more important than others and plummet back into the ego's gravitational force.

from a spiritual standpoint, it's helpful to remember that one will never be any more or less important than one ever was, or anyone or anything that ever was, is or will be. if notions such as "more," "less," "importance," "deserving," "wining" and "losing" can be put aside, spiritual growth will have much more space in which to operate.