opening eyes

opening eyes for the first time is like getting your head above water and breathing in air for the first time. after having been gone for an indeterminate amount of time, we are suddenly purely and intensely here.

in reality, we have periods of intense awareness sporadically throughout our lives, whether or not we practice to achieve them. but the nearly unbroken chain of mental identification that appears to take place within most of us most of the time can cast a surprisingly alluring spell on our attention, making us believe thoughts are indeed real and who we are is absolutely contingent upon a mental position.

accepting the presence of mental activity and being simultaneously aware of one's nature as the object-perceiving awareness rather than the object itself, life is approached from a different perspective, one that is not as strongly rooted to a limited sense of self but perceives its very essential nature as inextricably linked to everything it perceives.

when we suddenly realize that we are an aware presence encapsulated in a body with no true knowledge of why we find ourselves immersed in this human experience, we touch a true source of humility. we are ignorant to how exactly we've gotten here. it's as if we suddenly awoke within a dream and acknowledged to ourselves the fact that we don't know what this is or why we're here. we look and see with lucid unknowing. enlightened ignorance: the first step in any direction to finding out, since no answer can be provided without a question having been asked in some form or another.

while none of us will probably ever have all the answers, it is possible to arrive at a realization of one's existential, experiential nature that contrasts pretty vastly with what we may have been conditioned - or conditioned ourselves - to believe we were. being aware of one's ultimate nature as consciousness itself does not necessarily answer all questions, but with regard to one's sense of what one is it removes the need for a question to be formed in the first place. one is what one is as one feels oneself - not even that, since for one thing to feel another there has to be a perception of distinction; one firstly and primordially is, and all else comes after and falls within that.

to have a glimpse of awakeness as you're strolling from your car to work or school is like suddenly inhabiting an unsolved mystery, looking behind eyes that are as much an enigma as what they see. insects, trees, sky... what is it all? becoming passionate about finding the answer to this riddle we feel tugging on our very heartstings is the spark that will lead to a fire that will lead to a sudden flash of recognition: the recognition of something so obvious and intimate it is like we finally realized a truth that has been completely self-evident throghout every moment of our lives but has somehow managed to stay out of conscious awareness. since knowing what we are (by virtue of being it consciously) is the most relevant thing that could possibliy be, residing in a state of prevailing existential unconsciousness creates a deep-rooted and highly invested-in source of dysfunction, of unnecessary suffering.

life is not always easy but it can be an awe-filled, beautiful experience for which one feels an overwhelming sense of gratitude. it can be an adventure filled with adversity but on fire with passionate discovery and flooded by joy, contentment, and love. the alternative (the fear-driven life of ego-identification) is like hell compared to heaven.

the shift in human consciousness from "it's me against the world" to "i am a part of everything i see and everything i see is a part of me" is drastic and radical. it marks the beginning of the end of one thing, and the beginning of quite another. making unmistakable contact with our true nature may not solve all of the issues we think need solving, but it will resolve the one drive that, with or without our awareness, has provided the basis for every experience in our life.

can't get what you can’t not have

if you’re seeking final truth it’s critical to accept that what you have now – or more accurately, what you are – is exactly what you’re searching for.

the you you think you are is a fabrication, and what you truly are is what the you you think you are thinks it’s seeking. no matter what the invented you does, it remains a fabrication; and what you truly are remains immutably true. as you can see, ego seeking truth is as unresolvable a situation as a dog chasing its own tail.

illusion, no matter what its configuration, doesn’t yield reality. could anything you do in a dream make it become real? or change the fact that you’re actually snoring away in bed? illusion can neither add up to nor subtract from the truth; it can only act as a distraction.

adding to and modifying your dream character will only result in… additions and modifications to your dream character. a legitimate activity in and of itself, but it won’t produce enlightenment.

so how do you realize truth? by ceasing to chase its conceptual mirage through the dreamscape and allowing it to sink in of its own accord through non-identification with everything you aren’t – which, until the spark of unmistakable recognition sets flame to the bonds of illusion, includes everything you think you are.

writers of our own experience

we are simultaneously the scriptwriter, the director, the actor and the audience of our own film, but until we realize the level of control we have over our experience we’ll continue to play out the role of helpless marionette we’ve strangely carved out for ourselves.

the ironic thing is that even when we convince ourselves that we have absolutely no control over what happens to us or around us, we're still making all of the choices - unconsciously as it may be - that determine our experience at the most subtle level.

just as when we dream we may be surprised or terrified by unreal events that we ourselves are creating at every turn.